Wednesday, July 19, 2006

Funniest thing happened on the way to the ER on Saturday!!!

Most moms will read this blog with absolute hilarity and say, “Finally, someone else has walked in my shoes just once!” Well, pull out the Depends if you are bladder challenged in any way, because this one’s funny.

Saturday morning we woke up to bright blue sky here in Auburn and I said to myself, “It’s a great day to take Connor to the berry farm and pick out some berries and make our yearly supply of freezer jam.” So we got up and got ready for the day, ate breakfast with daddy and we were all about the business of making jam. I was checking my supply of sugar and containers and making my list of needs when I heard the ever dreadful “Beep Beep of Little Bug’s feeding pump. I just hate to hear those alarms because I am always wondering if this will be the alarm we can’t fix at home. Well, sure enough when I went over to read the machine it said, “No flow in.” So, I proceeded to try all of my “tricks” at unclogging the dreadful J-tube because I know if I can’t fix it, it means pack up and head to Children’s Hospital ER. For the next 2 hours Randy and I feverishly try to get that pesky tube unclogged. It’s as hard as a rock and we can’t get it to budge. So, with a grumpy attitude and a huff in my voice, I regretfully packed the diaper bag and secured Connor into his car seat and headed toward Children’s Hospital. Most of you that know me well, know that I can get pretty task oriented sometimes so once we were strapped into the car, I was thinking, “Get to the ER and get this day moving forward.” Little Bug decided not to be such a good car seat rider and he was screaming his lungs out. I thought his eyeballs were going to bulge right out of his face. And then I heard it…..It was an explosion of volcanic magnitude and then the crying ceased. Connor had pooped so bad I could already smell it up front. So, we weren’t more than a mile down the freeway and I stopped on the side of Hwy 167 to change the poopy!!! Not only had he pooped, he had totally wiped out the outfit he was in. Thank goodness I pack another outfit or we would have arrived at the ER only wearing a diaper. So after 10 minutes we were back on the road with the same task oriented thought, “Get to the ER and get this day moving forward.” After about 5 miles I looked on my dash to see a blinking red light that looked like Aladdin’s Lamp dripping oil. I thought to myself, this can’t be good. So I called Randy who happened to be on the base doing simulator training. He said, “Well Honey, you should check the manual and see how far you can travel and then you’ll have to stop and change the oil.” GREAT, I thought!!! So I pulled over on the side of the freeway again. As I am thumbing through the manual the car shakes every time a car zooms by at full speed and I’m just sure that this can’t be safe. Once I finally found the corresponding picture in the manual to what I was looking at on the dash, this is what I read, “If the oil light comes on and is flashing, pull over to the side of the road and turn off the vehicle immediately and seek emergency help.” GREAT, my emergency help is 40 miles away and unable to come rescue me. So, I did what any girl would do, drive to the nearest Wal*Mart. I bought oil and proceeded to the parking lot to change it. By the way, I’m sweating bullets because I was so hot. Ok, oil is changed and we are back on the road. Whew, what a fiasco. Connor and I were traveling at an inchworms speed because of something going on on I5 and I looked at the clock and it was time for a specific med that Connor needed, so just passed Boeing Field we found ourselves on the side of the freeway again giving meds to the tune of zooming cars and semi’s passing us by.

Once we arrived at Children’s Hospital everything was just fine and we were on our way once again. Then it was off to the berry fields. Oh yes, we did not thwart our plans. We were making jam one way or the other. Connor screamed the whole time we were in line to pay for our berries and then once we got in the car he seemed to get his personality back and he talked and cooed the whole way home.

We survived the day and the jam got finished, but boy did it come with a lot of drama. Hope that helped pick you up from whatever doldrums you’ve been in today. I’m so glad I can laugh at our hilarious escapades!!!

Lovebug Hugs,


Heather Bennett said...

I love it! :) I know it was not funny as you were going through it, it never is. However, it's great that you can look back and laugh. You truly are a MOM!!! Remind me some day to tell you about Lauren's projectile poopy 3 feet across the room at 2:00AM. :) Ahhhh the joys of motherhood.

Love you!

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