A better day for Connor...

Mama and "little bug" snuggling .....It's been a good day!!!!
Lots of snuggle time.


Little Bug snoozing on his tummy...


Lunchtime surprise with Marsha, Erin and Kathy. Thanks gals, the "real" food was great!!!
(Kathy's taking the picture...)


Proof that Connor started Pedialyte through his G-tube today.
Yippie...food in his tummy!!!


A view from the top of Connor getting all of his tubes and lines cleaned today!!
Nurse Becky was so great today...what love and kindness she showed to Connor.


Connor wide awake and ready to play....


Connor and Mama.....I think Connor's saying, "Mama, where's my daddy???"

Hi Everyone ~

What a good day it is today!!! Although Connor had a rough time throughout the night, he awoke to the morning sun with new strength. What an answer to prayer to see him happy and breathing easier. The docs decided that Connor doesn't need the collar to help position him for better breathing. They concluded that the swelling was probably the biggest culprite of the breathing, but he still isn't out of the woods yet. If, when the swelling goes down completely, he is still having trouble they will need to look into some different avenues of treatment. But for now, he is improving and God is answering our prayers.

We had another major milestone today. Connor was ok'd to start pedialyte through his G-tube. What a miracle!!! He has been tolerating a tiny amount of volume in his tummy and this is an excellent sign that he will be able to get back to mama's milk within a few days. He will still have to go at a very slow rate so that the volume doesn't stretch his little tummy too far, but it is definately progress!! If all goes well, we may be out of ICU in about 3-4 days!! Once we get down to a regular room they will order a swallowing study for Connor to see if he is safe to take his feeds orally. If he passes, then our hope is that Connor could get back to nursing!! What joy this would bring to mama (and daddy too)!!! Please pray on Connor's behalf that he could get to this point soon. I will keep you posted on the progress in this area!!

Lori enjoyed a nice visit today with Kathy, Marsha and Erin. They brought homemade food for lunch and that was such a treat!!! We had a nice little luncheon out on the deck of the family room. They even brought a table cloth and pretty napkins (with bugs) and plastic champagne glasses. Thanks gals, your visit did my heart good!!! Lori's cousin Janel also came to say hello and she got to see how good Connor was doing. Thanks for taking time out of your day for us Janel, it was really wonderful to see you!!!

The entire afternoon was spent holding Connor and snuggling as he slept. This was the longest, uninterrupted time mama has had with Connor since Feb. 28th!!! What fun it was just to smother his cute little face with kisses!!! Oh happy day!!!!

As I write this blog we are anxiously awaiting Daddy's return to us!!! We will spend our first night in the vintage trailer tonight!!! We lost our sleeping closet as the ICU is packed today!!! We pray that Connor has a great night of resting and an even better day tomorrow!!! I hope you enjoyed the pics above. We will take more tomorrow with Connor and Daddy.

All our lovebug hugs,
Lori

Tired Mama...

As most of you know, last night was a tough night for Connor. Through his struggle for breaths the doctors exhausted all of their resources for ideas to help him. I finally went to sleep after he calmed down about 2:30am. This morning he found a bit of a respite from his struggle. After meeting with the docs this morning they indicated that he may have what they call, upper airway constriction due to many factors. First, with Connor having down syndrome they suspect that he could have a thicker posterior tongue and when he positions himself to get better breaths by leaning his head so far back, his tongue may slightly slip into the back of his throat and cause a blockage. Second, there may be significant swelling from the breathing tube being in. And thirdly, his nasal passage ways may be blocked from all the tubes he's had up his nose. They are trying to remedy the swelling issue with steroids and they are considering a type of neck brace to position his jaw in a way that opens up his throat. At this point they can't find a brace small enough for his little neck and jaw area so they are using rolled up cloth diapers to help prop him up in different positions. Wow, who would have thought breathing could be so complicated.

Thanks for the morning visit today Maureen and Susanne!! It's always so good to feel the love of family and friends and today I really needed it after such a long night. Thanks for our new bunny "Mr. Pickles" Susanne, he's absolutely adorable.
Well, as you can probably imagine Mama is tired today. I've tried to lay down twice to catch some zzzz's but my mind races with thoughts of Connor and I am quickly up again. Hopefully, tonight will be an earlier night to sleep than last.

Many of you that are reading our blog have sent email messages that you are having a hard time leaving a comment. Here's how you do it. After reading a blog you will see a comment box at the bottom. Left click on it and a comment box will appear. Write your comment where it says Leave a comment and then at the bottom where it says Choose an Identity click on the word Other and fill in your name. Leave the webpage blank and then press Publish your comment. Viola and your done!!! I hope that didn't seem too elementary, but some have asked so I wanted to respond. We LOVE getting your comments. We LOVE to know that you are praying. I think I'm just as addicted to this blogging thing as some of you have told me you are, HA!

Some of you have also wanted to come for a visit and we would love that. I will let you know that while we are in ICU they are pretty strick about allowing family only barring a few exceptions. So I will let you all be the judge of what you prefer. If you want to come to visit with us, we would really love that. If you want to see Connor, you may need to wait until we are moved to a regular room on the medical floor, which will hopefully be soon. As always we will keep you all posted on where we are so you can make your best determination of when to visit.

Sorry for a blah sounding blog with "just the facts". Hopefully I will be back to my writting style tomorrow.
Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

End of the day...

Sleep tight little bug...


Ok, I know this isn't the best picture, but this is the newest contraption they have placed up Connor's nose. If you look really close you can see that Connor is blowing nose bubbles with the new tube. HA HA


Connor rigged up to breathe...his poor little neck has to be getting tired...


Connor with all of his tubes and IV's hooked up.


Hi all ~

Well, Connor has had a rough afternoon and evening. He is still struggling for every breath and they have literally spent about 2 1/2 hours in his room with him trying new things to help remedy the situation. He looks so tired from fighting. His little eyes are puffy from crying and his feet are literally purple from being poked. The doctors ended up having to give him steriods to try to bring the swelling down in his throat from the ventilator in efforts to open up the air passage ways. This did not work. Then they tried something called Heliox, which stands for Helium and Oxygen. They used the nasal canula to blow in both elements at once, but Connor couldn't handle the lower amount of Oxygen and his stats dropped into the 70's. This again did not work. They ordered X-rays and we are still waiting for results.

Now they are trying an NP tube in his nose to open up the passage way. I'm not sure right now what NP means but I will hopefully get a full explanation later. This seem to be allowing better movement of air for Connor. It's not working 100%, but it's not failing either. They have him drugged up again so that he won't fight this new apperatice in his nose, so he is sleeping at the moment. My oh my for what he is going through. They are watching him very closely this evening and I can tell that the intensity of the doctors has changed. I can tell they are worried that he seems to not be able to breathe without assistance. Please pray that his passage ways open completely to allow free air to flow through his body.
I am grateful that the docs aren't rushing to re-intibate him, but I also hate to see him like this. Once again, we must rally together and pray for the docs to have perfect wisdom on how to proceed with Connor. They keep calling him a "complicated boy" and I think that Connor just wants to keep us all on our knees praying for him!!
Thanks for the visit tonight Larry & Maureen, Kyle, Tyler and Derek. It was great to have you here at the very time the docs were with us. I needed your strength and your company...Thanks!!
Randy is home in Auburn tonight after leaving from here to help my folks out with their lawn. I could tell that my dad was getting frustrated that the lawn wasn't mowed on Saturday when I was there so when I talked to Randy about it yesterday, he was more than willing to jump in and help. Thanks honey for looking out for Dad and Mom. He also had to spend some time working at the base today, so he will rejoin us here at the hospital tomorrow.
As for me, my heart is heavy with worry for sweet Connor tonight. After watching him struggle most of the day I am exhausted from what my eyes have seen. Oh how I pray that God will put an eraser on my eyes so that I don't remember some of the sights I have seen. Only God can wipe away some of these memories. May I wake tomorrow with new hope and may Connor feel strength in his body and the breath of God in his lung. Thanks for your prayers faithful bloggers!!
Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

A battle for breath...

Watching our little bug battle for breath is painful. Seeing his little body gasp for the very air he needs is heart-wrenching. With his ventilator out this afternoon Connor is certainly fighting for each tiny breath he gets. His heart rate is high because he’s working so hard and now that I can hear his little voice & sounds he is wheezing and panting like he just ran a marathon. Oh Lord, let our son breath with ease!!!! Please help him fight!!

As I sit here by Connor’s bedside I’ve been praying for him. The Lord brought to mind a couple of scriptures in Isaiah 42 that I used to use in my counseling practice quite often.

Isaiah 42:2a, 3a, “He will be gentle…A bruised reed He will not break and a smoldering flame He will not snuff out...”
Isaiah 42:3b, “…He will encourage the fainthearted, those tempted to despair…”

What a comfort these verses are to me. I pray faithfully that Connor would be treated with kindness and gentleness. Even in the midst of his struggle, I believe that gentleness has been shown to him and most of the time gentle hands have touched his body. I’ve talked in other blogs about all of his pokes and bruises, and today I counted 24 pokes alone just on his feet. His legs and wrists are bruised now too. As a protective mama I look on when they come with their needles and I feel that this next poke will be the one to break Connor. But, as I trust God with Connor, he reminds me that “a bruised reed He will not break and a smoldering flame He will not snuff out.” Thank you, Lord, for comforting, cradling and protecting our little bug from harm.

As for me this afternoon I feel a bit like the description above in Is. 42:3b, “fainthearted.” When I catch myself spiraling into that zone of worry and despair for Connor, I must force myself to look up!!! I must find my strength and encouragement in Him. So that is where I find myself this afternoon, looking up and trusting God to help Connor win his battle for breath.
Continue to pray for peaceful breath for Connor!!!!
Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

Ventilator out...for now

This afternoon we made a big transition. Thd docs decided that Connor was ready to be extibated (that means removing the ventilator). When the respitory team came to do this Connor seemed to tolerate it just fine, but then 15 minutes later he began his struggle for breath once again. I could tell that the docs were worried about this because when they listened to his lungs they said they sounded great. What then would be happening to compromise his breathing in this way??? They started the heavy meds once again to settle him down and get the breathing under control. Since the surgery on Friday, the medical team made the decision not to use the c-pap any more because it could force pressurized air into Connor's belly and this could be disasterous for him. So what that means is that he will have to be re-ventilated if he can't start breathing properly on his own. Please pray that his breaths would be smooth and even. Please pray that he would be peaceful and restful so they don't have to keep drugging him up.

I was able to hold Connor for about 15 minutes when the ventilator came out. However, he was so upset I couldn't even calm him down. What great frustration fills my heart not to be able to soothe my own little bug!! He seemed to be in pain, and maybe he was from his incision for the tummy tube. I ended up laying him back down on his wedge (that we affectionately call "the throne) and he quieted down nicely. Hopefully after he rests for a while they will re-assess him and he can continue to be off the ventilator. I will keep you posted on what the rest of the day holds for us.
Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

A hand to hold...

This morning when I entered Connor’s room at 7:30am he was having a wide awake moment. His eyes were bright and cheery and I just know if he could talk, he would have said, “Good Morning Mama” with a giggle in his voice. His little hands were swaying to and fro and his chubby looking legs were kickin’ away. What joy I felt to see Connor doing some normal, daily activities. We haven’t seen him squirm around for so many days; it was nice to see movement. As I always do, I stepped up on a little stool so I could look at Connor from the top since he’s in that great big bed. I lovingly rubbed his cute little head in a circular motion and normally it calms him down or puts him to sleep. Today was different…..Today, right when I touched his head he had a hand reflex that made his little hand reach out and grasp my finger. We’ve held hands a lot, Connor and I, but today, he initiated it.

Wow, what a rush of emotions that ran through me at that moment. It reminded me of that first time that Randy reached over and held my hand. We were at a dinner theater in Denver, CO and I remember his cute, coy way of scooting real close and placing his hand upon mine. Oh how I wanted to jump for joy at that very second, but I felt I needed to play it cool as not to scare him off. I also remember wanting that play to last FOREVER so we would never have to let go. And now, I have his hand to hold for all of time and we have created another hand to be held by us forever and ever.
There really is something to be said about skin to skin contact. I naturally find myself wanting to kiss and rub and softly run my cheek over Connor all the time. It gives me goose bumps to feel his little movements and to smell his little baby skin (however, right now he needs a bath Really Bad!!!) How great it is that God created us to need contact with each other. I know the first 2 weeks of being here without Randy I longed for his touch and his presence by my side. The day he returned to us, I met him at the hospital’s Giraffe entrance and we began our walk to Connor’s room. It didn’t take him long and he reached out and grasped my hand and, finally, we had contact. There really is something intimate about touch. It speaks words to the heart that the mouth could never say. It touches deep within us to give us the strength and courage we need for the moment. Amazing isn’t it? All of that in just a simple touch.

I have had many hands to hold in our journey. Many of your hands have held mine and I am forever grateful to have had you by my side. I think of Maureen and Jacqueline and Kathy and Mom (R.) on that first scary day in the ICU when we could have lost Connor. Your hands gave me strength. I think of Mom (M.) during our first 3 days here at Children’s and she stayed with me and held my hand when Randy had to be away. Thanks Mom, you gave me courage. I think of Bryan (my brother) who was by my side for visits and always took a moment to reach his hand out to mine. Thanks Bryan, you have such a tender heart toward us and towards Connor. I think of my sisters Kathy, Marsha, Lynette, Teresa, Maureen & Kathy who have all taken time to come and hold my hand. You gals are a source of joy to my heart, Thank you!! My sister Heather has held my hand over the phone and in so many touching comments and emails. She has taken time to capture the true heart of love by being forever constant in her correspondence. Our dads have even stretched out their big, strong, rugged, work stained hands to lay upon us in prayer. Thank you for your ever-vigilant expressions of faith. I think also of our pastor’s who have by phone and in person been a hand of love and who have been the hands of God to us. Thanks Pastor Don for your many visits and Pastor David for your phone contact. I especially think of Randy, my husband, my love and my partner in life. Your strong hands have reached in to bring comfort, love and joy to me in this difficult time for us. Watching you place your hands on Connor is such a joy to watch. You tickle and touch him like no one else can. Thank you for your devotion to us. You are the greatest husband in the whole wide universe, and I love you all the way to the moon and back again!!! Lastly, and really most importantly, I think of our tender-loving Heavenly Father. His hands have cradled us, wiped the tears from our eyes, held us up when otherwise we would fall, and He has led us with unwavering direction & guidance in our journey with our “little bug”. Just like I wrote yesterday, I don’t know how it is that God can completely care for each one of His children all at the same time, but He does! We know that our journey is not the only thing on God’s mind. You too, have concerns and requests that you are bringing before the throne. But this we do know, we are all important to Him and He takes great delight in all of us, His children. He is able to take us all through the specific needs in our lives with His gentle and loving hands. We thank God that He is the Deliverer and the Rescuer of our souls. We are grateful for our salvation and for God’s presence with us.

I guess what I am trying to say here is that you are all blessings to us!!! Whether far or near, you have reached out your hands to us and we are forever grateful. Your touches of love are penetrating us!! I hope that we, in some way through this blog, are reaching out to all of you in return to hold your hands by our hearts.
I will leave you this morning with this one question…Who’s hand are you holding?
Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

Answers to prayers....

A morning view of Connor with his little lamb and new Prayer Bear looking over him.


A special visit with "Auntie Linda" and "Granny Kathy". You gals are awesome.

Hi Friends ~
We were visited today by our dear sweet Bible study pals who have honorary status as Auntie Linda and Granny Kathy. We so enjoyed an infusion of joy from these wonderful women of God and they even brought treats with them. Of course Randy loved the chocolate kisses (thanks Nita) and the little red prayer bear for Connor is adorable. We were also blessed by a special time of prayer for Connor and, as always, we gain so much strength from the prayers of the saints!!! We appreciate each and every prayer that is going up on our behalf. I know that God is answering your prayers and I must share a few specific and personal answers that I have already received.

Just the other day I was speaking with my sister-in-love Kathy, and she shared with me a specific prayer she had prayed for Connor the night before. She prayed that the angels would rub Connor's head the same way I do to put him to sleep. I was taken back by that because I pray every night that God would cradle Connor the same way I do since I can't pick him up. What an answer to my prayer that Kathy was praying specifically for Connor in this way. Thanks Kathy, I love you!

Another answer for Connor came in the form of one word, HOPE! During our first 5 days here at Children's another sister, Auntie Maureen, brought us a special Willow Tree figurine (something we collect) with a little boy holding a balloon that said "Hope" and then just today I received an email from another sister of my heart, Heather from Virginia, entitled "Hope". Every day I have also prayed that in the midst of all of our uncertainties that God would find creative ways to give us "Hope!" Thanks sisters for being a vessel that God is using in our hearts.

Yet another answer to prayer came with a nurse that I can't even remember her name. She called Connor a "mighty boy". Since Connor was born, we have prayed that he would become a mighty man of God. It's one thing for the nurses to speak sweetly to Connor and call him cutie pie, and lovebug, and muffin, but this particular nurse actually called out a character quality that we are praying for our son. Thank you unnamed nurse for being a voice of prophetic truth to us.

A few nights ago I was in the chaple here praying for Connor and I encountered the sweetest experience. I watched a little old lady come in bearing a small basket upon her arm. She looked like a very old version of Little Red Riding Hood. I watched her go about her business and then she came over to me and she asked in the shakiest of voices, "Are you praying for your baby?" I said, "Yes I am, his name is Connor." She then asked if she could give me a special prayer scarf to put in his hospital crib. I replied, "Yes!" She reached into her basket and pulled out a white and yellow scarf and said, "Here, this one is intended for a little boy and I just want you to know that when I sit and crochet these scarves I am praying for each child that will receive it. I pray for their healing in Jesus name and for their complete health to be restored." With tears in my eyes I received this special gift and she reached her hand out to pray with me. When she walked out of the chaple I knew I had been visited by a very special angel. You see I have also been praying that in our experience here we would encounter angels around every corner to bring us love, and encouragement. I know this was a specific answer to our prayers.

I am grateful for the way that you all are receiving these blogs and for your specific prayers. Please be faithful to share with us how the Lord lays it upon your hearts to pray for us. I will be faithful in return to report how you have been used in our lives.

Goodnight & Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

A couple of pics of things we've talked about...

Here's a close up of the IV line that Connor had in his head where he received his blood transfusion.


Daddy, mama and Connor with our surgeon, Dr. Kim.
Thanks Dr. Kim for preforming a successful surgery for our little bug!!!

Today at sunset.....

During our experience here at Children’s Hospital I have not afforded myself the luxury of walking outside at sunset. Today, I broke the trend. While I was walking back down the long hallway from the cafeteria after dinner I spotted the glow of the setting sun through a far away window. I realized that with Connor still sedated, he probably wouldn’t recognize that I didn’t come right back from eating my dinner. So with a certain swiftness in my steps I hurried to the family room area where there is a beautiful deck that overlooks the facility here. As I stepped out into the brisk air, I breathed in a deep breath of “spring”. Yes, it’s officially springtime!!!! As I watched the sun bid farewell to the day I was struck with the colors I beheld. Upon one glance I would see an amber glow, and then after a single blink, the sky seemed to turn pink, purple and violet all at the same time. How does God do this I wondered? How does He, in His infinite Heaven, hold the stars, change the color of the sky and care for my “little bug” all at once? How great and how big is our God???!!!! It is awesome to behold His Greatness. It is humbling to know I am on His agenda. It is beautiful to watch His hand smooth away my worries and give me a glimpse of “Hope” in the midst of such uncertainty. Today at sunset my heart felt peace and my eyes beheld the glory of God and I am thankful I didn’t squander the opportunity to have such a powerful moment.

My heart has been in a quiet place today. With Connor remaining on so much medication and with his constant need for stillness, I feel a bit lost by not being busy about the duties of motherhood. I’m not comforting a fussy spell, I’m not changing the “poopies”, nor am I rocking my little bug off to sleep in my warm safe arms. Instead I am sitting in a hospital rocker chair with empty arms and tear filled eyes as I watch our son lay sleeping. This afternoon Connor’s team of nurses and doctors determined that he needed to stay on the ventilator for a couple more days. Because of that decision they had to re-tape the dressing of his ventilator. When they did this, Connor became very upset and agitated. Many of you may remember a while back that I wrote about what it was like to see Connor cry with this ventilator in and not be able to hear the audible sound of his cry. Today while this was happening I had my hand next to Connor’s face and when he cried I caught two drips of his tears in my hand. They were wet and they were warm and they quickly soaked into my skin. I clinched my fist to remember the feeling of his warm, soft tears touching me. I guess as a mother we always want to wipe our child’s tears away, but today, I just wanted to hold onto them a little longer as it’s all I had to cling to. Have you ever considered holding your child’s tears, so that, for a moment, you may become one with their hurt or pain or frustration?

This reminds me of the scripture in Psalms that says, “He catches my tears in His bottle.” Have you ever thought about that? Our tears penetrate the heart of God. So much so that he holds them and collects them in his bottle. To me, that is a message of incredible tenderness. This speaks so deeply to me that God does not dismiss our sadnesses and the concerns that cause us great worry. He collects them in His bottle and He cares for them. With His very hands He nurses our tears into joy. His concern for us is unique to our specific pain and whatever it is we are going through. Today, Connor’s tears taught me a lesson in tenderness. I can’t wait for the day to come where I will tell our sweet baby about the day mama caught his tears and how they changed my heart.

In the quietness of this day my heart is left with the question, “What is it that moves the heart & hand of God?” Is it our desperateness? Our questions? Our fears? Our pleadings? Our praise? Our petitions? What is it that makes Him move on our behalf? And I believe that my answer for today is that it is our sincerity. Out of the sincerity of our heart we request of God only things God can do. Only He can calm my heart and stop my worries. Only He can bring me joy in a sunset. Only He can heal our son or give us grace to handle each day of sickness. So if you ask me if I feel the Heart of God in our experience with Connor, I will say, with resounding refrain, YES! If you ask me if I feel the Hand of God upon our hearts, I will jump to my feet and say, YES! He is here with us, and though we may not see progress yet, we wait expectantly. We wait upon the promises of God to be poured out among us and we wait for His perfect hand of Love to rest upon our family.

Tonight I will go to sleep with tear stained hands, with a picture of a beautiful sunset in my heart and a feeling of peace knowing that we, the Robertson’s from Auburn, Washington have touched and moved the heart and hand of God. Thank you Lord for your revelation to my heart.

Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

Sunday Evening Introspection

Mama looking into the eyes of her little bug and talking about better days ahead in the "Promised Land" (read below!!)


A view of our little bug with eyes wide open earlier today. Ventalator still in along with decompression tube in his nose that drains the air from his tummy.


Good Evening Faithful Bloggers ~

Today was another day of sedation for Connor. It is so hard, as his parents, to watch him in such stillness, but yet we know that God is healing him in that quietness as well. There were two times today that he opened up his eyes wide to see us. He was still on pretty heavy medication so we are quite sure that he wasn’t really cognoscente of seeing us, but to Randy and I it felt like a small gift just to talk with him and love him with his eyes looking in our direction.

It’s amazing what I see in those precious eyes of his. I see the beauty of concentration as he studies the shapes and colors and faces around him. It is always so fascinating to see the wonder in a child’s eyes, but when it is your own child it takes on a brand new meaning. I realize that Connor is wondering about “his” world, about “his” parents, and about his experience in this very hospital. And then I wonder…..Will he remember these white walls? Will he remember the smells of alcohol and sterilized tools? Will he recall the nurses’ faces that have cared for him? Will he remember that his mama was holding his hand? Will he remember the numerous pokes on his body that have caused him pain? Will he remember our voices whispering “I love you soooo much little bug”? Will he remember our bedtime prayers and stories?

There are so many feelings and questions that come to mind as I sit and let myself truly reflect on our journey thus far. There is so much spiritual significance to what we are going through that sometimes the parallels are frightening because I wonder what God might ask of us next. Just the other day when Connor went into surgery, my dear friend Jacqueline was here and she reminded me of the story of Abraham. When God called Abraham to go “to a land that I will show you” that was a pretty vague directive. There were a lot of questions in Abrahams mind, but what we see in God’s word is that Abraham was obedient. Did he have struggles along the way? You bet he did! Did he question God? He sure did! But what is so significant about the “journey” that Abraham and the people of Israel went on is that it led them to the Promised Land! I feel that this is what God is showing Randy and me about our journey. By faith we are walking day to day in a direction to a land that we don’t know. We have no idea how long it will take us and what detours we may have to take along the way. At times (most of the time) we don’t even feel like we have a map to get there, but one thing we do know….GOD IS FAITHFUL!! He will lead us to the Promised Land. How excited my heart gets to think about what the Promised Land is going to be like with our precious little bug. I’m sure we will run & play, and giggle & laugh, and hug & kiss, and learn & grow. But right now, we must heal first and gain strength for the next leg of the journey. Healing takes time, and healing takes patience and we must surrender ourselves to the process. Connor’s healing is coming to us in waves that we did not expect. We did not expect to be hospitalized and we did not expect to have such a medical experience these first weeks of his life, but this was intended on our map for our journey. I don’t think we can fully appreciate yet, exactly what God is doing and what he is showing us. But, we are trying desperately to make ourselves available to the Lord and to His plan for Connor and for us as a family.

Another spiritual parallel I see happened on Friday night, actually Saturday morning at 1am when the phone in our room rang and we were asked to come to Connor’s room immediately. When we arrived we were told that Connor had lost more blood in surgery than expected and he was in need of a blood transfusion. This threw us a little for a loop because we weren’t expecting it. After signing the consent forms they had to put an IV line in the top of Connor’s head because there were no other veins available. He received his blood transfusion over about a two hour time period. When we came back to bed, I laid there awake thinking about Christ’s blood that was shed to be infused into our lives. I wondered at that moment about the blood that Connor received, and I have to be honest I was worried about it being clean enough for Connor and I was worried that it wouldn’t be compatible with his body. But then the Lord calmed my heart and I felt this message from the Lord deep within my heart, “Lori, don’t be afraid. I have placed my blood inside of Connor to give him life and life more abundantly.” I have to believe that God gave me that message to give me peace and to trust him fully with our son. I am finding that there is a lot to trust God with when you have children. Our experience is not like most, but all of you parents reading this will resound with similar responses that you have had to trust God with your little angels as well. Being a mama to my little bug is teaching me so much about God, so much about love, and so much about trust. I wouldn’t trade our journey for anything in the world. Take me deeper in the journey Lord, I am ready and I am willing and we will faithfully go to the land that you will show us.

Lovebug Hugs,
Lori

Weekend Update...

Uncle Les, Auntie Marsha, Cousin Haley, Daddy & Mama with Connor.


Uncle Loren, Auntie Kathy & Cousin Kacie with baby Connor. If you look real close you can see a little stuffed "Abbey" dog on the back of the crib from Uncle Larry and Auntie Maureen. (Thanks guys, the dog is so cute!!!)


Hi friends ~

This weekend Connor has not had a lot of activity because he has been heavily medicated. Most of his moments have been spent sleeping peacefully. Since they wanted to keep him very quiet, I took some time on Saturday to retreat down to my folks house and check up on dad. He is recovering so nicely from his open heart surgery. His scar looks pretty impressive and I think my dad kinda likes to show it off!! HA! My mom is taking such good care of him and they are faithful to go on their daily walks to get dad stronger. Continue to pray for him because he is still in a time of recovery!!! I'm proud of you dad!!
Randy spent some time away on Saturday as well doing some dog training activities and we met back together at the hospital on Saturday evening. Today, Sunday, we were visited by lots of family and we had a great time visiting with everyone. Thanks for the visit Loren, Kathy, Kacie & Lindsay, Rick, Kathy & Sarah and Les, Marsha & Haley. We love the encouragement you bring to our hearts when you come to see Connor!!!

The doctors are starting to talk about weaning Connor off of the ventalator maybe tomorrow or Tuesday. Please pray that Connor can tolerate the breathing on his own and can show everyone what a big strong boy he is.
Lori

Pictures from surgery day....

Connor with his special "bug" letter from Grandpa & Grandma Milliren


Kissing our little bug goodbye before surgery.


Snuggling with Auntie Kathy the day before surgery.


Wheeling off to surgery....here we go to the operating room.


Snuggling my little bug the day before surgery. What a wonderful feeling to hold my baby in my arms!!!


Daddy giving the family the good news of the surgery results.


The final walk before the operating room.


Connor on the operating room table. This is part of the intibation process. Look on the right hand side of the picture and you will see the nurse holding onto Connor's fingers. How sweet that she took such good care of him when we could not be there holding his hands.


Connor after surgery with all the hoses and tubes attached. How sad for our little bug.


Daddy and mama with Connor the morning of surgery.

Hi everyone, dad here. This is a picture of me with Connor yesterday morning before surgery. He is sleeping like grandpa John when he is watching the Price is Right and has no idea what he is about to go through. As always, it is hard to know that my little guy is going to be poked and proded. But at least we know that this surgery will hopefully help him in the long run.

Oh I do want to thank all of you for the nice gifts and cards I received for my birthday…that was so thoughtful. Lori took me out to a fantastic dinner and got me a cool DVD player ……she is the GREATEST…I love you Lori!

Well its time for Dad to sign off…but before I do I want to personally thank all of you for your care and concern for Connor….or as Mommy says “Mama’s little bug” but Daddy says “My little guy”

Love
Dad

Successful surgery....PRAISE THE LORD!!!!!!

God is faithful....He has answered our prayers!!! Connor came through his surgery with flying colors. He returned to the ICU around 5pm and when we met with the surgeon he said that Connor was an excellent patient. They were able to do the surgrey laproscopically which was a great relief and answer to prayer for us. He has 4 incisions on his belly that all have stiches in them and 1 incision is where the feeding tube (G-tube) was inserted. When they where inside of Connor's belly they also found that he had a hyatal (sp?) hurnea (sp?) so they fixed that as well as doing the Nissan procedure. They found what they had suspected all along that Connor has what they call a supermodel stomach.....very small and long in size. This made the procedure a little more difficult, but our surgeon had great skill and accuracy and was able to band off the esophagus very well. Dr. Kim (our surgeon) felt the surgery was an absolute success!!! PRAISE THE LORD FOR ANSWERED PRAYER!!

Connor is pretty heavily sedated at the moment and he has the ventalator as well as a nasal decompresion tube to drain out all the extra secretions and air from his stomach. He will be kept sedated for several days so he can heal and more than likely we won't be able to hold him for 5 or more days. Randy and I feel a great sense of relief just knowing that he is out of surgery and that he did so well. We know the next days will be touch and go for Connor as he begins the healing journey, but we are at least, on the way to better health. The outlook for how long we will be here is still up in the air, but they say at least a month more! Once again we need prayer for strength and endurance.

There is much on my mind that I want to journal to you, but I will be honest, my body is weak and my mind is weary. We are going to go to bed early and catch up on some much needed rest. I will journal tomorrow from a more introspective heart.

Lovebug hugs,
Lori

Daddy's turn to try this "blogging thing"

Hello everyone...yes its Daddy "blogging" this time. Mommy has it all figured out so I better hurry up! Daddy has a lot to say too ya know!

Well this is going to be a quick update because Connor just went in to surgery! Yeah! Grandpa and Grandma Robertson along with Kathy and Maureen are here so we are just in waiting now and praying. I do want to thank all of our family and friends that have kept us all up in prayer...Thank you so much!!!! Well I must sign off for now but will try this "blogging thing" later so you haven't heard the last from good old Dad!

He's going in.....

Hi Everyone ~

We just got word from the operating room that Connor is scheduled for an 11:15am pick up for surgery. That means they will be here to pick him up in just moments and then he will go to the pre-op room and get all of the anethesia and the ventalator put in and then off to surgery around 12:00pm. Please pray that Connor responds well to all of the avenues of surgery today. We are extremely pleased that he is going in today and we will keep you posted with surgery updates!!!!
Lori

End of the day blog

Today was a long day!! Maybe it was because we did not get a lot of sleep last night or maybe it's because sitting and waiting is so exhausting. Connor slept for the majority of the day and then had a bit of difficulty this evening. He was supposed to get a blood draw for possible surgery tomorrow, but after 40 minutes and 6 pokes, and no blood, they gave up. He will have to get poked again in the morning, so pray that they will be successful the first poke. His pour little feet and veins look like he's been through a war. Since he has remained back on the c-pap machine they didn't want us to hold him a lot today. But, for an hour this afternoon he came off the machine and mama got some snuggle time with her sweet little bug. Auntie Kathy got to fill her arms with his sweet little snuggles too. I think just having my arms around him is therapy to my heart.

Connor got the cutest posters today from the missionett group at Ferndale Assembly of God. Thanks girls, the posters are great. He also received a clever little poster from Grandma & Grandpa Milliren with little cut out bugs all over it. What a fun idea, thanks so much dad and mom!!! Auntie Kathy came to visit and brought lots of birthday cards for Randy and also some yummy cookies and frosted rice krispy treats........Uuuummmmmmm, Yummy!!!!!

We can tell that Connor is weary in his little body. He has little circles under his red eyes and the little bruises on his wrists, hands and feet are just plain sad. His little cry has turned into a big cry and we know he just wants to get better so he can go home. How we want to spring him from this place and run home to our safe haven called "home". It seems that Randy & I don't even talk about the subject of when we will go home because it seems so far off. Please pray for our endurance!!!!

Randy enjoyed a few hours away this afternoon to go and play with our dog Abbey and do some training with her. Randy is an excellent dog trainer and he loves Abbey so much. I think it was a good birthday present to him to just go out in the fields and train with her. When he returned we took a short little trip down to the University Village for a birthday dinner. It was a quick trip as both of our bodies were tired and both our minds were still here at the hospital with Connor.

Update of surgery - As of right now, we understand that Connor is on the surgery schedule for tomorrow, Friday. He hasn't been assigned a time slot yet, so we are still waiting, but we are very hopeful that tomorrow will be the day. As always, we will keep you posted on any progress we make in this department.

Signing off for now to try and get a decent nights sleep. Once again, Randy says thanks for all the sweet and sincere birthday wishes.

Goodnight & Lovebug Hugs,
Randy, Lori and baby Connor

Randy's Birthday!!

Good Morning ~

After a long, virtually sleepless night, we awake to a new day!! Connor remains on the c-pap machine. He was off for about an hour this morning, but was put back on because of labored breathing. The team of doctors made their rounds this morning and assured us that they are trying to work swiftly on our behalf to get Connor his surgery soon. It will not happen today, but they are hopeful for tomorrow. We will keep you posted.

We are headed down to the cafeteria with Randy's folks to have a whoopin' big celebration of his birthday over grilled cheese sandwiches. This certainly is not how we planned to celebrate, but we will all make amendments to our schedules. We understand that Auntie Kathy is on her way to see us today as well, so we will look forward to her visit.

Connor is resting comfortably at the moment, so we are thankful. He is so tired from this difficult journey and it is good when we see him sleep on his own without the help of drugs!!!
Randy says thanks for all his birthday greetings by message, email and postcards. It's nice for him to sit and be encouraged by all of your kind words.
Thanks for your love,
Lori

Calling all midnight bloggers....PRAY!!

I just left Connor's room and he is struggling!!! His respatory rate was so high they had to put the C-pap machine back on him. His blood pressure and heart rate are skyrocketing and he is screaming like there's no tomorrow. What horror for a mom to see and not be able to pick him up and comfort him or even stand close enough for him to hear my voice.
We are concerned for him in these times that he is not getting the comfort that he needs and deserves. Please pray tonight for the nurses. I could tell when I left that they had had about enough and were giving him a double dose of Adovan to quiet him down. I HATE DRUGS BEING USED THIS WAY!!!!!! I know that he needs something to bring him back down to a mellow place, but, for the first time here, I didn't sense kindness in the hands of the nurses. I sensed frustration and experienced grumpy faces and voices from them. Please pray tonight that Connor would be visited by angels unaware and that they would minister peace to his small and fragile little body. My heart hurts for him and I cannot help......Feeling helpless with your own child is a desparate place to be. How I want our baby to be calm and healed and lying in our arms. Please pray for sweet peace to descend!!!!

Quick pic of the clowns

Daddy and the clowns with Connor....Wish you could hear their sweet song. Connor slept through their whole performance, but daddy and mommy were blessed beyond measure!!!

Day of waiting

Hi Faithful Friends ~

This morning when we awoke at 5am we anticipated a different day than we received. We prayed over breakfast, "The Lord's Will Be Done" and surely it was. As you know from the previous blogs Connor had a rough morning fighting off a fever and a few episodes of respitory distress. After they switched the surgery schedule around they told us we would be able to send Connor in for his surgery in the afternoon and then as the afternoon progressed, it became evident that the surgery would not take place. Finally at 5:30pm the surgeon came out and said that it wasn't going to work and we would have to look to another day. So, the Lord's will was done!!!! Apparently, Connor was not supposed to be in that operating room today. Yes we are disappointed and frustrated because we do not have a rescheduled appointment yet, but, by faith, we believe that this was the best thing. Unfortunately, Connor will have to wait for an open spot in the O.R. and that could be as early as tomorrow (but not likely) or as late as the 1st of April. Let's all pray that God will work it out for Connor to be put on the schedule soon. He is suffering so badly from this reflux and aspiration pneumonia. His little lungs are working sooooo hard just to breathe that it is actually painful to watch.

Throughout our day of waiting, we experienced many sweet surprises along the way. We were joined in our wait by Grandpa and Grandma Robertson and Auntie Maureen and we even played a couple of hands of Rook!! Connor had several special deliveries that brought us great joy and smiles. First, a colorful flower delivery from our home church, NW Family Church. Thanks Pastor Bullock & church family. Next, Connor received a really cool stuffed jungle bear and balloon from special friends in California. Thanks Barry & Heidi!! And last but not least, Connor had some special visitors....2 clowns came to see him and they sang him the sweetest lullaby from the movie "Dumbo". We tried to put a video clip on the blog, but somehow it's not coming through. I will continue to try and post it with better luck, but if I cannot make it work, let me just tell you it was the sweetest thing. Connor is such a lucky guy, he also received another jungle friend from sweet friends in Colorado. Thanks Ted & Debbie & Joseph!!! We all feel so blessed by kindness and love that keeps pouring out through all of your encouraging words, emails, postcards and letters. Thank you from the bottom of our hearts!!!

Randy spent some time today setting up our new "homestead" property out in the back 4!!! Parking lot 4 that is here at Children's. Depending on how long we stay, we might end up claiming the homestead laws for property ownership...ha ha!! Tomorrow we will celebrate Randy's 46th birthday here in the hospital. Not exactly what we had planned, but we are learning to make small celebrations everywhere we go.
Got candles? YES!
Got cake? YES!
Got presents? YES!
Then I guess we'll have a birthday!!!!
We started celebrating a little bit early tonight as Randy's folks got us out of the hospital for a couple of hours with Larry and Maureen to celebrate Randy & Larry's birthdays!! Thanks for the Chinese food Dad & Mom.

As I write this message, Daddy is up snuggling with our little bug and mama's getting lonely for her two best guys. So I will sign off so I can get down to the room and be a family for awhile!!!

Praying for a better day for Connor tomorrow and progress in the surgery dept.
Saying Goodnight with Lovebug Hugs,
Mama (Lori)

Pictures of the day

In the waiting room with Grandpa (sleeping...no surprise) and Grandma Robertson



Our little bug in his ever growing jungle of furry friends and playful pals along this journey.


Connor with Daddy and Mama first thing in the morning. We thought he would be going in for surgery so we were having lots of cuddle time.


Connor sleeping tight in his jungle.


Daddy's hand helping to keep binki right in its place. Let me tell you, you don't want to be in the room when that binki falls out and he decides to get mad!!! HE HE :-)

Temp came down!!!!

PRAISE THE LORD......Connor's temp came down to 97.8!!!! X-ray looks compromised, but not inoperable!!!! If all stays well Connor will keep his appointment with the surgeon this afternoon.

Continued surgery day update

Hi ~

As we wait for word on Connor's ability to withstand surgery we just heard that he needs a blood draw to check on his white blood count in case there is an infection and they also ordered a chest x-ray to view his little lungs. We will get results soon and they will make a determination about the surgery. This morning they had a difficult time getting blood so they had to draw blood from an artery in his head. Please pray that he doesn't have to get poked too many more times!!!
Lori

A great prayer poem

My Guardian Angel

Dear Angel ever at my side, how lovely you must be, to leave your home in heaven, to guard a child like me. When I'm far away from home, or maybe having a bad day, I know you will protect me from harm along the way. Your beautiful and shining face I see not, though you are near. The sweetness of your lovely voice, I cannot really hear. When I pray, you're praying too; your prayer is just for me. But when I sleep, you never do; you're watching over me.

We know that there are a legion of angels at Connor's side protecting him and giving him peace. We're quite sure that he asked one of those angels to come and be by our side as we patiently wait for information. We're also quite sure that he has an extra special angel tickling his little toes because every now and then we see a cute, little, crooked smile rest upon his lips. We are so blessed by our sweet son.
Lori

Morning of surgery

Hi friends ~

Today is surgery day. Please pray because Connor is having a rough day. He has had a few episodes during the night and this morning that have the docs a bit worried about his readiness for surgery. He is running a bit of a temp (101) and his stats are a bit high as well. They decided to switch him to the afternoon slot to give him a chance to settle down and let his fever come down. We have been praying that God would give the surgeons wisdom and we believe that this is his perfect plan that Connor wait a few hours before going into the O.R. We will keep you posted throughout the day today.
Lori

Todays pics

Randy and Lori's new home away from home.....
Sorry it's so dark, but it was 9PM when we took this pic!!


Leave me alone, I'm busy now....and hey, get your paws off my binki!!!


"Our little bug" sleeping in his jungle of stuffed friends.


Connor says, "Ahhhhhh....I'm tired of being in the hospital....Please take me home soon!"


Daddy and Mommy with Connor the night before surgery.

8 pounds and growing....

Hi all ~

As most of you know, Connor has struggled with gaining weight since the day he was born. It took him a little over 5 weeks just to get back to his birth weight which was 6lbs 12oz. We celebrated when he made 7lbs and now we celebrate our next pound marker...8lbs!!! Tomorrow we will send our big & strong 8lb baby boy into surgery.

We, Connor & I, enjoyed a morning visit from Auntie Maureen. She always lifts our spirits and Connor loves snuggling with her. While she was here we were visited by the anethesiologist, who went over all of the specifics of the surgery. Connor will go into pre-op at 8AM where he will receive a general anethesia and then he will get a type of spinal tap which will numb him from the chest down. He will also have the ventilator put back in for surgery and probably keep that for around 24 hours. After that the surgeon will make 2 incisions for the laparoscopy tools and perform the Nissan procedure which will partially band off the bottom of the esophagus . Then he will have an additional incision to place the G-Tube into his tummy for feeding. We understand that when he is done it will look like a little button by which we will feed him until he gets strong enough for his open heart surgery. Tomorrows surgery will last about 2-4 hours depending on how successful they are with the laparoscopy. We should be getting hourly updates from the OR on how Connor is tolerating the surgery. Once the surgery is over, we will join him in the recovery room.

Yesterday and today have been days of reflection for me, mama!! Yesterday both Randy & I were blessed to receive a 30 minuet massage from the family services volunteer program. When I had my massage the gal had a beautiful CD playing with nature sounds and birds chirping. In that moment, I realized that we are just 6 days away from the spring season starting. I thought about the beautiful trees popping open their blooms and all the tulips and daffodils and crocus' peaking their cute little heads out of the ground. Baby birds are learning to fly and to sing their pretty songs and the sun is beginning to warm the cheeks of all who go outdoors. I realized in the same moment that I carry a certain sadness with me everyday because I can't put my son in a stroller and walk amongest the beauty I so love. Instead, we sit in our room and entertain thoughts of better days. I catch myself embracing a tear every now and then as I grieve these days we have lost, but then I am encouraged greatly by the very signs of spring. Why??? Because spring means new life. That which was under the ground is now emerging from the frost a beautiful new life. How precious it is that God gives us those dark nights of winter to bring forth such gorgeous beauty. I truly believe that God is doing this in Connor. We have had such a difficult "winter" season with fear and uncertainty, but spring is coming!! I have to trust that Connor's best days are ahead. We love him so much and know that God has an incredible plan for his life. Won't it be wonderful to watch this little miracle unfold in front of us, just like a spring flower peaking his cute little head out from the darkness!!! Up out of darkness is where I know we will eventually emerge. But right now, we have to continue to push that dirt up slowly so we can see sunshine soon!!!

Randy returned to the hospital this evening with trailer in tow!!! We now have an official residence at Children's Hospital, or you could say, as Auntie Maureen, that we are officially trailer trash!! HA HA!! We are so grateful to have a place right on the campus to stay so that we don't have to be far away from our "little bug"!!! Tonight we will stay in our sleeping closet so we can be with Connor first thing in the morning.

We want to again say "Thank You" for all the love and prayers you are all sending our way. We love your comments and emails and special post cards here at the hospital. Wow...we are showered with encouragement!! For those of you who might not know about it yet, you can send a special message straight to Connor (and us) through the children's hospital website www.seattlechildrens.com. Thanks to all of you who have sent messages!! We love to read and re-read them. They bring smiles to us constantly!!

We will update periodically throughout the day tomorrow to let you all know about the surgery.
Lori

PS ~ Today was especially eventful with the visit from "Healing Paws", a dog organization that brings pets around to visit the kids. In our case it was mama who needed the healing licks and kisses from the cutest little dog. She was a tiny black and white dog and her breed name in French means "flying butterfly". When her ears were perched it actually looked like she could fly away. What a sweet visit!!

Continued photo documentation

Connor bundled tight as a drum so he doesn't pull out his C-Pap machine. C-Pap stands for Continuous Positive Airway Pressure.


Connor with his "patches" on so the cords don't crease his face. My oh my what he has to go through, but his orange binki is with him every step of the way.


Daddy's first peak at Connor after returning home from overseas on Friday.


Oh how good it feels for daddy to get Connor in his arms.....24 hours of straight flying around the world is all worth it just to hold his sweet little guy.


Three nights before our trip to the hospital. Connor's kinda grumpy in this pic because we had spent the entire afternoon in the ER at Mary Bridge earlier that day. But let me tell you, he looked so cute in his puppy outfit!!

More pictures from the journey

After ventalator was removed & Connor was still under sedation.



Two days after ventalator came out and Connor got to wear his own clothes. Doesn't he look great!!!


Connor & Mama in isolation with the ventalator in.


"Mama's little bug" sleeping like an angel!!!


During the first night of Connor's sedation when the ventalator was in, I looked down at his hands and he was doing the sign for "I love you". I'm just sure that Connor's cousin Olivia taught him how to do this the day after he was born when she held him in the hospital. What a precious reminder this was to me that Connor knew we were right there loving him.

Another day in our journey

Good Evening All ~

Here I sit at this computer screen trying to figure out how to post pictures to a blog. What effort it takes to do the simplest things these days!!! Above you will see a quick pic of Connor in his Teddy Bear outfit before coming to the hospital and another pic of Connor with his best pal "Abbey"!! To the left you will see Connor with the ventilator in place a few days ago. My oh my how a few days changes the life of our family. One minute snuggling with a furry friend to the next minute having a breathing tube inserted to help you stay alive. Whew....what a journey.

I realize that for many of you this is your first pictoral introduction to Connor. How I wish we had been blessed to take the typical drive down to JCPenny's to get our first photo taken in our best outfit. Believe it or not I had tried to do this on the day that Connor came to the hospital because Randy was going out of the country and I wanted him to carry a picture with him. But he was so agitated when the photographer took his pictures that I had to tell her we would have to come back another time. When we drove home that day I would have never realized in just a few more hours we would be headed to Children's Hospital for an indefinite stay. I can't wait until the day I can post that JCPenny's photo in Connor's best outfit with a great big smile on his face and wide open eyes!!!

Today we switched rooms in the ICU because our little roommate was suspected of having a respitory virus that would be contagious. So we packed up all of our things and moved 3 rooms down the hallway. It was a fairly good day for Connor except for one refluxing episode that sent him into absolute orbit!! Grandpa and Grandma Robertson were there at the time to witness how upset he was. He got a dose of Adovan to help him calm down and he slept most of the afternoon.

Daddy got to snuggle with him a while before he left for home tonight. Randy will be bringing the trailer up to the parking lot here at Children's so we will have a place to sleep that we don't have to sign up for every day!! We have been blessed to get a sleeping closet each night we have been in the ICU but our time is running out to have this commodity!! It will work out best to have the trailer here since our time here will be much longer than we originally anticipated.

Today they scheduled Connor for his surgery on Wednesday AM. He will be getting the Nissan Fundoplacation and also a G-Tube for feeding. They tell us the surgery will last anywhere from 2 to 4 hours and the will try to do it with a laproscopy tool, but if that fails they will revert to a typical incision surgery. Please pray that Connor will be strong in his body on Wednesday to withstand the surgery and the additional stress on his heart. Connor, unlike other babies, doesn't have a lot of reserves to draw from so he has to be a fighter and an overcomer to make it through this.

We are gaining daily strength from all of your prayers and words of encouragement. Please don't stop!!! We love you all and we will blog more tomorrow.

By the way, thanks for the visit today Grandpa and Grandma Robertson!!!

Day 12 of the journey

It is Sunday night and we are about ready to hit the hay! Connor has had a good day as he was able to get off the c-pap machine for the time being. All of his stats looked good today and was able to be on normal oxygen instead of the pressurized air most of today. He was alert and wide awake for about 2 hours this afternoon when he was able to get a little bath. He smells so great right now....like a baby instead of a hospital. How we wish we were bathing at home in his little tub spa he got from Grandpa and Grandma before he was born. After his bath he got to snuggle with mama and daddy for a couple of hours. What sweet affection we feel for our son when we hold him in our arms and close to our hearts. The love and dedication are always there for your little one, but there is certainly something special that happens when we hold him in a tight embrace.

This morning at the hospital Randy went to the chaple and picked up a copy of a special prayer for kids. We wanted to pass it on to all of you so you could use it as a guide when you pray for Connor.

Prayer for a sick child:
"Lord Jesus, You said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them. For the Kingdom of God belongs to such as these." It is so hard to watch a child suffer, Lord. Help me to pray in a powerful way to reach this child with your healing grace. Bless my hands, Lord, that I may touch in your name and lay them on this child in the ministry of healing. Let me be an instrument of your peace. Let your presence flow through me. Let my hands be your hands. Let my words be your words so that this child may be healed in the name of Jesus Christ. I give you this concern, Lord, fully and with no reservations. I hand him over with complete and utter faith that you are with us at this very moment. I believe Lord, help my unbelief. Amen"

Today was a good day on our journey and we pray for a good night of sleep for our little bug!! Thanks for the visit today with Ted, Teresa, Chloe, Emma & Jake. The poster is great. We can hardly wait to put it up in Connor's room once he has a room outside of the ICU. We also enjoyed a couple hours away from the hospital with Larry and Maureen. They have been taking care of our dog "Abbey" so it was nice for us (especially Randy) to see her and play. Thanks Larry and Maureen for the use of your freezer space!!!! We had a bit of a breast milk situation here at the hospital where I needed more storage space, so thanks for clearing a spot for us to store the good stuff!!!

Tomorrow we should find out more info about a surgery date for Connor. We will try to post pictures tomorrow and update more clearly what we find out from the docs.

Good night for now and thanks for all your prayers,
Randy, Lori and Baby Connor